For over 10 years, I have worked with couples as a coach and licensed therapist to improve their relationships, helping them to get to know themselves and their partner in a way that fosters a previously unimaginable level of love and intimacy.

I would love to help you do the same.

My name is Kelsey and I am a Relationship Coach, trained Sex Therapist, and the founder of Loving Longer. It’s very nice to meet you.

If you were to run into any of my clients, you would quickly learn how geeked out I am about relationships.

I feel especially passionate about the research and science behind successful long-term relationships and supporting sexual desire and satisfaction over time.

I also specialize in working with parents — fostering connection and meaning through the unique experiences and challenges related to being both partners and parents. I support parents in raising their children according to their values and modeling what a happy relationship can realistically look like in long-term relationship.

I believe that you, just like every person, deserve to live your life in a way that matches your values and enlivens your spirit.

Amidst a world that is becoming increasingly obsessed with being busy, this means I am here to support you in learning more about yourself, your partner, and the shared values between you. My goal is to strengthen your relationship amidst the chaos of daily life…and to help you see that it doesn’t have to feel so chaotic.

These passions are why I started Loving Longer and spend so much of my time working with couples throughout the United States to strengthen and deepen their marriages and relationships (including, but not limited to, couples who are parents).

I decided to become more informed. I went to school for a long time — both for my Bachelor’s and Masters’s degrees, as well as for numerous Certifications and trainings. And when I’m not in trainings, I can be caught red-handed with a new non-fiction book about relationships, sex, parenting, finances, mindfulness, birds, or whales that I can’t wait to talk about with whoever will listen.

I became a Licensed Professional Counselor and a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in the state of Michigan. As a trained Sex Therapist and a Certified Birth Doula with a bunch of parenting and discipline certifications and trainings under my belt, I found a special niche and expertise at the intersection of relationships, parenthood, and sex.

(I have yet to hear of anyone else who shares this combination of specialties — and has the training and experience to back it.)

This niche also includes a focus on holistic health and mindfulness. I have been studying and practicing mindfulness and meditation since 2009. I consider myself an advocate for being “at ease” instead of “busy” – although I often am reminding myself to live what I teach.

Every day in my work with clients, I support couples in learning how to fight the strong current of our modern culture that pulls them away from living according to their values.

As word of my specialties grew, I found myself doing less and less “mental health” work. Clients came to me for support in their emotional connection, physical intimacy, communication, personal development and confidence, birth preparation, and parenting practices / coparenting relationships.

I also began being contacted by couples from around the country – friends of friends who had heard of the life-changing work being done by courageous humans in my office. And so my Relationship Coaching career was born.

To this day, my practice still thrives through word-of-mouth referrals of couples seeking closer intimacy, friendship, and overall relationship satisfaction.

And throughout all of that, I’m also still learning how to love — just like you are.

My experience of love has transformed. It started as something that was anxious and territorial, wrapped up around my identity (even though I didn’t know it) and seeking constant security and reassurance.

I wanted to be a person who was loving and thoughtful. But in trying to be a specific person, I limited who I could actually be. And I engaged in a form of love with my partner that didn’t feel mutually reciprocal. I felt like I was giving more than I was getting.

Then everything changed and we discovered, after a mere 12 years together, that perhaps the fantasy of how we wanted the relationship to feel had kept us from feeling what was really happening between us.

And this is when our love story truly began… after seeing the hardest truth I’ve ever looked at.

This new version of love was open-hearted and all-encompassing. I felt secure and confident IN MYSELF in a way I had never experienced. I felt an openness and generosity of love within me that I thought had existed before but didn’t… and I suddenly wasn’t willing to be taken advantage of anymore.

In this new awareness, I ended the relationship with overwhelming grief, sadness, and gratitude — but with a deeper love and appreciation for his personhood than I had ever known before.

The ending of our relationship was beautiful, painful, and tender. And yet we remain good friends and coparents because in this new version of love, there’s no other way to go about it.

Love isn’t about ownership or obligation. It’s not about fairness or power.

It comes from an awareness of self, an expansion of the heart, and a willingness to lose.

And lose, I did. I lost my marriage, my pride, and in the midst of unraveling such overwhelming pain and confusion, I lost my first business. Because when our life is falling apart in one area, it touches everything else around us. And as my values, priorities, and insight into myself shifted, I was able to begin to show up differently — and more authentically in myself — than I ever had before.

If my partner and I had been able to learn this new version of love for ourselves earlier before too much damage had been done, I’m convinced we would still be together today. 

Instead, we are both still grieving the loss of the relationship. And even in the midst of that grief that will only soften (never end) I found my way into a new relationship. One that was, and remains, profoundly different in how it offers partnership, intimacy, and security.

Ruthless compassion and honesty with myself also allowed me to recalibrate my friendships, the way I spent my free time, and my goals as a business owner and entrepreneur. Through all of this, I learned to love myself — including all of the mistakes I made when I was overcome with grief and wasn’t operating with integrity towards myself and others in the way I wished. 

I learned how to love myself fully. That’s what happened. And that’s how we learn to love others, too.

We aren’t taught how to love in this way… but we need to learn. We deserve to learn.

How can we love in a healthy wholesome way if we have no frame of reference for it?

I’m here to help be your reference point. Until you don’t need one anymore.

And of course, your relationship won’t take the same path mine did. In fact I hope I meet you as soon as possible so it doesn’t. But if any of my story resonates for you, you’re in the right place.

(And as an important note, while I am a Licensed Professional Counselor and Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in the state of Michigan, my Coaching services do not provide counseling or work with mental health challenges.)

Most Relationship Coaches might focus on behavioral changes to make your relationship feel happier.

Here at Loving Longer, we will focus on deeper internal work to support you both in becoming the individuals you want to be so that you can create a relationship that isn’t focused on only lasting LONGER but is, most importantly, a partnership that enriches the lives of both individuals within it.

Behavioral changes alone cannot be sustainable in achieving this — although they certainly can get you to celebrate another anniversary.
Regardless of why you might come to me, as we begin working together, you’ll learn a few important things to support you in loving each other (and yourselves) for longer:

• How to communicate in deeply meaningful and loving ways
• How to create the closeness and intimacy you deserve
• How to have realistic expectations for your relationship long-term
• How to live in more alignment to your values — both individually and as a couple
• How to create sustainable positive change that will last long past the end of our Coaching relationship

Don’t worry, I know what you’re thinking now. I want all of those! When can I get started?!

Well hold your horses, new friend. I feel just as excited as you do, but first, you might want to learn more about Relationship Coaching. So go ahead and grab some tea, take a journey through our Relationship Coaching and Loving Longer Philosophy pages to see if this is a good fit for you, and settle in as you start imagining the amazing potential for your relationship — and your own personal fulfillment — that could be ahead.

I’m ready! How do I get started?

Before we can get started, I need to know a little more about you. Please fill out the contact form below to tell me what you are looking for.

If I believe that I can help you on your journey, I’ll send you a few more things to fill out and then we will schedule an initial 90-minute meeting conducted via video.

You’ll learn right from the beginning if this approach and dedication to research are a good fit for you. Are you feeling excited yet?

Yes! I’m ready for a happier me!

Additional Credentials

• Trained Sex Therapist (University of Michigan)
• Certified Simplicity Parenting Guidance and Discipline Group Leader
• Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (Michigan)
• Licensed Professional Counselor (Michigan)
• Completed Level 2 Training in Gottman Method Couples Therapy (Gottman Institute)
• Previous Certified Birth Doula through DONA International